Saturday, December 31, 2016

Wow..almost Christmas and I see I haven't posted since September! Billy and Brit are doing awesome and are eagerly awaiting the big day. Billy insisted on putting the tree up on Rememberance Day and last night was my first opportunity to wrap and get some gifts under it.

I have had a busy few months painting both canvases and wood signs. sold a few, gifted a few and hope to keep a few.  Paul is setting up a table at the flea market in St John again this Sunday to sell some.  He seems to enjoy all the people that stop by. I can't put into words how it makes me feel to know that he is so proud of my work..just fills up my heart.

We had a fun day painting signs at the Community Living Center last month. Everyone had the chance to make a sign to gift this Christmas and they were all proud as punch with their achievements.  This Friday is their Christmas dinner and dance so I volunteered to prepare the meal.  Today I am roasting two of the three turkeys and every day this week I will do something else in preparation. Glad I got my wrapping done last night...lol!!

And then....

It appears I got side tracked in my blogging once again and it is now New Year's Eve!
The dinner for the program went off without a hitch. Everyone had full bellies and then danced the night away, great time had by all!
Next was our own Christmas dinner. Britni was able to spend a night at her mom's and came home Christmas eve. Billy was invited to his brother Ricky's house for Christmas dinner which was his first family Christmas  since his mom passed away many years ago.  You can only imagine how excited he was...he was vibrating waiting to be picked up!
We had our dinner on boxing day. Kristie, Brooke and Brandon gave me a new laptop which not  only surprised,  but overwhelmed me. I think I was just tired from the busy month and had to shed a few tears to let go of some of the tension...lol.
Next was Paul's family Christmas dinner on the 28th. It was held in their church hall which worked great. Lots of room for visiting and for little feet to run off their pent up energy.
I squeezed in a painting party with his sisters the next day, it was a nice afternoon and even more special since all 5 of the girls were home and able to get together.
So now it's time to ring in a new year. I don't know how 2017 can be much better than 2016 but I am looking forward to whatever is in store for me.
I wish you all joy and happiness in the upcoming year. I will raise a glass to good health and great memories!
Cheers!


Sunday, September 4, 2016

Answered Prayers

I make plans every day for one thing or another.  Plans for today, this week, next month, even sometimes a year in advance.  It's nice for me and most people to know what is coming up, helps us stay organized and can give us something to look forward to.

I wish it was that way for the girl that lives with me. (I won't say her name for privacy reasons even though she did want me to write about her on my blog).  Her life can be turned upside down just by telling her we are going grocery shopping after lunch.  Once she has been told this, nothing else matters.  She can't stay focused on anything else and constantly asks, "What time are we going, can we get lunch stuff, am I going to see one of my family or friends, can I put my shoes on now?"  It goes on and on until I want to pull out my hair.  I have learned over the past three years not to mention anything until I have my keys in hand. Sometimes I slip up or she will overhear me mentioning an errand to Billy so if I plan on leaving in an hour I tell her we are leaving in three hours which usually buys me time, it's usually the last hour that her anxiety builds.  When I call her to get her shoes on an hour later she is happy and excited to be going!

Now I am making plans for a trip to Cape Breton in July for her, Paul and I.  If I tell her, it will be three months not only of anxiety for her but time for her to try to sabotage the trip.  It's not that she doesn't want to go, I think she knows if her behaviors become too much I won't be able to take her, the vacation will get cancelled and she won't have to think about it anymore.  I can never be sure exactly what she is thinking because she can't seem to explain her feelings except through her behavior.  So, I won't tell her, the night before we leave I will cautiously pack her bag and put it in the van.  When we are on our way out for a drive the next morning to get a coffee I will tell her where we are going and she will be thrilled.  She really does love surprises, which when I think about it, for someone with autistic tendencies is rather unusual.  Just goes to show how each person with a disability can not be defined by the label some doctor gives them.

Now when things do go haywire and the behavior explodes what do I do?  At this point there is no talking to her, she has gone beyond the ability to think clearly and to understand what I am saying.  As calmly as I can, I redirect her to her room away from anyone or anything she can harm.  Since I am human some days are easier to maintain my own control during these situations than others. There is absolutely no point in trying to explain anything to her at this time.  The only thing I say is "when you are calm we will talk".  She wants me to say something, anything to keep the drama going.  I Do NOT physically restrain her, just quietly redirect her back to her bed when she comes at me arms flailing.  Eventually she wears herself out and when she has calmed enough I sit with her on the bed and give her a hug.  Even though she is still calling me every name in the book and babbling nonsense I know its almost over and soon she will be filled with remorse and I feel she needs to know I care about her.  I understand she hates acting in this way but for whatever reason has no control over it, so I wait, and let my own heart rate return to normal.  I wait sometimes hours, sometimes as long as a day before discussing the outburst.  I wait for that teachable moment, in the calm when I can be heard and she can think clearly.

She really has changed in leaps and bounds and I am so proud of her for making progress. I often hear from people that I am special for doing the job I do.  It takes a special kind of person to look after those guys, people say.  It takes patience, understanding but most of all I think it really just boils down to wanting someone who came from chaotic beginnings to just have some peace.  Maybe I just want to be the answer to someone's prayer.  What I know for sure is that the folks I care for may come with some challenges but it wasn't until they came into my life that I felt like I was really doing something special and that they are the ones that answered my prayer.

Playing Catch Up

It's not surprising that I have not posted for August.  I knew it was going to be a busy month with visitors from Ontario,  a trip to Ontario and then more visitors. Add to that having my kitchen renovated and all the disorganization that comes along with it there was no time left for blogging.

It was a great time though,  spending lots of time with friends Debra and Randy Vinzce, Elsie and Donny McCurdy and then a visit from a lady I used to take care of when I worked for Community Living Brant.

After returning from Ontario it was a rush to preserve all the peaches, cucumbers and tomatoes I brought back. Melody, Britni, Billy and George were great helpers and in two days we put up 24 quarts of dill pickles, 26 pints of chili sauce, 26 pints of tomato butter, 10 bags of freezer pickles and 18 bags of peaches!!




When my guests from Ontario arrived it was a great 5 days of relaxing and traveling around. We followed it up with an overnight stay in PEI doing some shopping and having a blast at the Sandpit amusement park.  Billy and George especially loved the go karts!



Now that my kitchen is almost done, just waiting for new flooring to be installed life is getting back to normal.

Yesterday I spent an enjoyable afternoon painting with Paul's sister Denise.  It's no surprise to me that she did an awesome job on her first painting. She is a very crafty and talented girl! I hope we get to do it again soon 😀!!

So now it is time to relax a bit before October and everything that month has in store. Three birthdays, Thanksgiving and Halloween.  I do still have a couple days trips in mind for September but to me that is included in relaxing...hahahaha!!

See you back here in October!

Thursday, July 21, 2016

Busy, Busy, Busy

The middle of July already!!  So far the summer has been great, a nice amount of rain to keep the grass green and lots of warm, sunny days for traveling and being lazy :)  My friend Michelle helped me stain the deck, a lot of work and it got pretty hot out there before we were finished but the results were worth it in my opinion!

 I also painted my doors purple and got the flower beds landscaped so it was a pretty busy time leading up to our trip to Cape Breton!!


Our trip to Cape Breton with Britni was great.  We stayed at the Fieldstone Garden Guest house on the Cabot trail which was very comfy.  At the front of the property was a leather shop where I was able to purchase leather strap door handles for my soon to be updated kitchen cupboards and drawers.  Britni, as usual made lots of new friends and Paul was impressed with how high up we were overlooking the ocean, so a successful trip for everyone.

Billy had another great week at camp this year and is now looking forward to his next vacation at the tree houses in Miramichi with Mike Evans.

I finally got up the nerve to display my paintings at the town farmer's market last week.  I was so surprised by the number of paintings I sold and all the positive feedback on my work.  What a great incentive to keep going.


Paul even managed to come for a look around, he had hernia surgery on the Thursday before and was at my house recuperating.  Billy loaned him a walking stick he had made and he slowly made his way around the market, happy to be out of the house.  Now he is back at his home well on his way to full recovery and anxious to get back to work.

Last night while out for our drive we stopped at the old Pocologan School which has been turned into a home.  They were selling all the contents and the property so I had to have a little look see :).  What a wonderful couple that own it. I was over the moon happy to find a farmhouse style sink...BRAND NEW...for sale.  This is exactly what I was hoping to have in my newly renovated kitchen.  Now all I have to find is the counter-top, and of course someone to install it :).  The kitchen cupboards are being refinished, (painted) the week I am away.  Going from pine wood grain to an antique cream.  I am hoping this will brighten up the kitchen!

August 12th we leave for Ontario.  My friend Elsie and her husband Donny are coming with me this summer.  My main objectives for the trip are of course to visit mom and dad in their new rooms at Leisure Living and to stop at St. Jabocb's market on our last day to get my cucumbers, peaches and tomatoes for canning. In between I hope to see a few friends and relax as much as possible.

So that's the update for July, see you back here after my trip to Ontario and once the canning is all done!

Tuesday, June 14, 2016

Summertime....

And the livin' is easy....This song comes to mind when I think of summer.  The season I think most of us look forward to all year, the season that comes and goes so fast and the season we pack so many enjoyable activities into.  This summer is shaping up to be chock full of visitors, vacations, day trips and of course all the great food to go along with it.

So far June has started out kind of slow with the cooler temperatures and rain.  With a bit of help I have got the inside of the house whipped into shape for my upcoming visitors from Ontario.  Billy and I have managed to keep the lawn work done in between rain showers and soon the flower beds will be getting their face lift. Paul built me the cutest little flower box that sits under the window in front of my van full of pretty blooms and draping greenery.  The front veranda is adorned with two huge hanging baskets of purple petunias that stand out nicely against the yellow siding.  I am hoping to have all my outside doors painted deep purple this summer too...love me a little splash of colour!!

I spend a couple days a week relaxing at Paul's house.  It's nice to take my paints and just spend some time painting with no distractions. This is my most recent painting which I really like.  I want to do a few more of them with different types of flowers on each.


We still enjoy our evening drives.  Last night we ventured down to St. Andrews for a delicious supper at Old Time Pizza and a cruise along the water.  This little deer was out for her evening walk and stopped to pose for a picture.

Tomorrow is officially the first day of summer and overall I would say I'm ready!!  Bring on the visitors, vacations, add a little bit of crazy just to keep things interesting and happy summer to all!!!!!

Thursday, May 5, 2016

Setting things Straight

Spring has arrived, the snow is gone now for another year and April slipped right past me.  I guess nothing too exciting happened last month to write home about.  So now it is May and I can feel the excitement of trips and guests arriving starting to build.

Brooke left for Ontario to visit friends on April 29th so Melody and George have been camping out with us for the week.  We have been having a great time with lots of laughs, bonding in the kitchen, and of course enjoying our drives when all the good talks happen.  I thought I would wrap up the week with a trip to Miramichi for a couple nights.  We leave tomorrow (Friday) and will be back sometime Sunday evening.  Monday Brooke will be back and our visitors will return home and life as I know it will return to normal.

Something interesting did come to my attention this week.  Rumor has it that someone in town heard that Billy helps out around the house and yard.  Their opinion is that because Billy pays rent he shouldn't be doing work around the place.  I will admit that my first instinct was to be pissed off that someone who knows nothing about us had the gall to judge.  Then I thought about it and my opinion is that they are just another negative Nancy with nothing positive going on in their own life so they sit around Tim Horton's exercising their loose tongue.  I asked Billy if he had ever been told this by anyone and this was his reply: "No, but if someone did say that to me I would set them straight.  I would tell them Peggy does nice stuff for me so why shouldn't I do nice stuff for her?"  This is one of the things I love about Billy.  He doesn't have a problem telling it like it is!  This is called a reciprocating relationship, a concept many adult children don't understand.  Billy gets it! When you do nice things, nice things happen even if that nice thing is only the good feeling you have for doing something nice.  Billy takes great pride in every little job he does around here and also the jobs he does for the town and anyone else that asks him for help.  He has so much energy that if he doesn't burn it off in a productive way it can build up and wreak havoc on his nerves.

I will tell you my thinking behind Billy helping out.  If I had an adult son living in my home I would expect him to pay rent to cover the costs of living.  I would certainly also expect him to help out with day to day tasks around the place.  This is a home and we think of ourselves as a family, not a special care home, not a group home, a family.  I  think people living in group homes and special care homes miss out on so much if they are not allowed to help out to the best of their ability.  They miss out on the pride that comes from a job well done and the feeling of gratitude they get from the recipient of that help.  They become totally dependent on someone else for every little thing and can also become expectant of having everything in life handed to them.  So many people I know have gone from living a life with purpose and skills into a home where they have lost those skills and become dependent with not much reason to get out of bed in the morning.Could this also be the reason behind so many people with disabilities suffering from depression?  Hmmmm??  

 I do believe in some circumstances a person with a disability can be exploited, made to do work and not receive their just rewards.  This is the reason sheltered workshops are becoming a thing of the past.  All people hired to do a job should be paid nothing less than minimum wage, period.  However, when being a part of this family we know that if we do the work together we have more time and money to do things we love to do.  The time and money we save allows us to travel to visit family and friends, explore new places, meet new people.  There is never a day where we are staring out the window watching the rest of the world go by wondering where they are headed or wishing one of those cars full of people would stop in and visit us.  No sir, we are far to busy for that!

The greatest compliment I have gotten was from Dr. Lister.  He grew up with Billy and has been his family Dr. Billy's entire adult life. He said to me "I have never seen Billy so happy, keep up the good work and keep doing whatever it is you're doing."  That was the best payment for what I do!

So there is my rant for today.  If you have an opinion, please feel free to comment below.  Now it's time to finish laundry and pack our bags for tomorrows adventure. A group of people, living together, helping each other along the way, heading off on that ribbon of highway, reaping the rewards of our hard work and dedication to our family!

Have a nice day and enjoy your Timmies :)



Thursday, March 24, 2016

A Break in March

Tired of winter I decided a trip to Ontario was in order.  I packed up the van on March 17th, picked Brit and Billy up from their day program then surprised them with the news that we were heading to Ontario!!  We had a nice relaxing drive up, despite the snow we ran into around Edmunston to Riviere Du Loupe, Que. where we stayed for the night.  Friday morning when we left Riviere Du Loup the ground was covered but the sun was shining and the roads were clear.  With stops in Brockville and Napanee  we made it to Mount Hope around 8pm Ontario time where we stayed for the night.
It has been a relaxing week, enjoyed spending time visiting with my grandbabies Jaxx and Scarlett, Kristie, mom and dad, all my siblings and my friends Christy and Pat.  I am so grateful to have such good friends as Debra and Randy Vinzce who opened their home to me and my gang.

We finally made our way to downtown Toronto for a visit to the Ripley's Aquarium.  It was just amazing having sharks, stingrays and all sorts of other fish swimming over top of us and all around! Brit and Billy both enjoyed it as well as seeing the CN Tower up close.  




After a long week of studying for exams, Debra and Josh needed a relaxing evening so I introduced them to the Art Sherpa and they each painted a Bohemian Elephant.  We had a lot of laughs and a wonderful evening. Even though the paintings aren't quite finished yet they are amazing!!!


March 19th was dad's 87th birthday and Pat threw a party for all us kids to spend time with mom and dad.  Mom wasn't feeling quite up to snuff but it was a great time being all together again.  Thanks Pat for hosting the party and all you do for our parents!!


Tomorrow we have been invited to Easter dinner at Pat and Dan's, Andrea is going to paint a picture with me!  Thanks for the invite Pat!!! 
So, after a few trips to Dover, parties and visiting it will soon be time to head down the road again back to our life in St. George, NB.  

Friday, February 5, 2016

What the.....!!!!!!

Well I don't know where January went, sorry for the delay in posting.  It has been such a great winter, nothing exciting happening but weather-wise it's been a real treat. Today is February 5th 2016 and we are getting a nice amount of snow.  Its been snowing all day and once again everything is covered in a blanket of white.  We have had other days like this and then afterwards a few warm days and it just disappears.

If you follow me on Facebook you will see that Brooke and I have taken up acrylic painting, such a fun bonding time with some pretty impressive results.  We watch and follow along with Youtube videos provided by The Art Sherpa, Cinnamon Cooney.  These are such great tutorials for beginner painters and even those with more experience.  Next week I am planning a painting class at the program Brit and Billy attend to get them started following the Sherpa.  We are going to paint Birches in Snow which Brooke and I painted last week.

I spent a couple nights in Saint John for my get away this month.  It was so relaxing just not hearing my name being called for two days...LOL!!!  Tomorrow George and Melody are coming to stay over night so Brooke and Brandon can have their break as well.  It's nice that Brooke and I can switch off like this for respite, very convenient and can be last minute planning.

Other than painting up a storm, nothing is really happening in my happy little world which is always a good thing.  When too much starts happening we somehow manage to go off the rails with behaviors and that is never a good thing.  I am hoping, if the weather permits and my friends Debra and Randy are up for some visitors, to squeeze in a road trip to Ontario for a week in March just to break up the winter and perhaps celebrate Dad's birthday with him.

Here's a few of my latest paintings so we can compare in March to see if I improve.



See you back here next month, take care my friends :)